Sheep pretending to be snakes.

I have a friend who, whenever I'm in her company we seem to end up having some kind of adventure.

I shall call her Cheese, she knows why I'm calling her Cheese, it's a long story, but is not related to her feet at all! She really hasn't got cheesey feet!

Anyhoo..... I digress! Adventures..... More often than not rather strange ones! And more often than not, they're 'mishaps'!! Sometimes, occasionally, perhaps booze is involved..... Sometimes booze isn't!

We decided to go and explore another part of Wales one day because our days off had fallen at the same time.

So we packed our toothbrushes, some pants and a few CD's to play in the car. Sat in the car and pulled out a map. I closed my eyes pointed to somewhere on the map and our destination was a place called Milford Haven, so off we went!

We were pootling away, music blasting, windows wide open cos the weather was gorgeous and beeping and waving at good looking men, and sometimes at OAP men for a giggle!

We got to the local YHA there, sorted out our accommodation and set off on the half hour or so walk to the village to have food and a drink or two!

Fast forwards to after dinner, we decided that we should buy some vodka and go and drink it on the beach because it really was a beautiful day/evening.

We spent a few hours there, drinking, paddling, getting to know the local teenagers that were there. Then it started to get dark....

'We'd better not go back along the road' said I, 'for we are sure to be knocked over and killed by all the speeding cars!'

'You're right' agreed Cheese, 'We should walk back along the coastal path, no matter that you wont be able to see in a few minutes, or the fact we've been drinking, it's the safest and most sensible thing we could do!'

So off we went, the coastal path was a maxium of six inches from the edge of the cliff and there was no fence or wall or anything that might have prevented us from toppling down to the sea if we fell!

Cheese walked in front in order to guide me, tell me when there was a bump, an upwards bit, a downwards bit, a crumbly bit etc etc etc!

She was wearing a light coloured top so I was able to see a very faint block of grey to also help guide me on my way.

We had walked no more than ten minutes when Cheese suddenly fell to the floor, giggling like a mad woman and saying 'I can see, you can't and I've fallen over!'

Hmm..... Suddenly risking the roads seemed like a far wiser idea! I sat down and said

'I'm not moving, I'm staying here! If we carry on we'll fall in the sea!!!'

Cheese was still giggling like a demented woman, and eventually I started giggling too!

Cheese pulled herself together and said 'We should climb this tall fence and walk across the fields, that way at least we wont fall in the sea!'

So over we climbed and started to walk through the fields.

Now as you should all know by now, I can't see in the dark, at all. So I've got a hand on Cheeses arm to prevent me falling over. I wear hearing aids and so can hear fairly well with them in.

We had been walking for a while when I was suddenly aware of hissing noises...

HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSS............. PISHHHHHHHHHHH........... HIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSS

'Cheese, Are there snakes in Wales?????'

'Dunno, why?!'

'Can't you hear them...........???'

Cheese stopped suddenly, 'Hear the snakes??? What are you about?????'

By now my heart was starting to pound a little faster and my fear levels were verging on panic mode. 'There!!! Didn't you hear it??? That hissing noise!! It's a sodding snake field!!!!'

Once again, Cheese started giggling like a demented woman, 'You can't see them can you??? It's the sheep weeing whenever we go past them!!!'

'WHAT??? What the hell are you on about??'

Giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle.......

'When we walk by them they either get up and run away or get up and do a wee!!!!'

'Oh......'